Our first NWLA tournament article each year is generally our roster announcement. With this being Commissioner Gallaway’s last year, and some real soul searching going on about the final spots, our roster isn’t going to be finalized until Sunday night, July 12th. (Matt Gagnon, we just can’t quit you…but we probably will.)
As a result, we had to come up with something else to kick off our NWLA articles with.
With most trash talk around the NWLA tournament, we know (or assume) it’s all good natured fun. We HOPE that’s not the case with the back and forth here. And, we’d be sadly disappointed if these two guys didn’t either beat the shit out of each other, or make mad passionate love, when they see each other in Columbus this year.
Follow the war on twitter, watch the videos of their games, if you don’t know what we’re talking about. Actually, don’t waste time on that at all…just pick a side, using the info we provide below.
Everyone has their pros and cons…let’s dig in on this epic battle.
|Weight||2.5 Evan Bischoffs||.90 John Suhre|
|Future Earning Potential||Murky||Murky|
|Boys Kissed||3||1 (Excluding Ryan Bush)|
|Championships||1 – 2014||1 – 2012|
|Rape Stare||Pedophile Level||More like inappropriate touching but no rape stare|
|League||They allow steals||Is it really a league?|
|Colors||Green||Orange…Orange you glad it ain’t green?|
|Face Black||See Above||See Above|
|Met Chris Gallaway||No||Serves on Host Committee With Him|
|Losses to the PWL||Eliminated from tournament, 9th place||Sent to Losers Bracket, but Ended up 4th|
|Most Known For||Rape Stare||Ryan Bush|
So, there you have it. Basically everything you need to know to pick a side in this battle royale.
Obviously, we’d love for this to be settled once and for all on a wiffleball field. But since both players are the 4th of 5th best players on their teams, and not really factors in whether their teams win or lose, not sure that’s a fair way to settle this.
Maybe we vote? Maybe they have a hot dog eating contest in the food tent Friday night at 7:30 PM? You tell us.