Six Innings

Six Innings

Often throughout the season, though not as often as we’d like, we’ll sit down with a player and ask 6 questions in 6 innings. While Pulitzer winning journalists we are not, we enjoy these and think you will too.

Select a player’s name from the pull down to see their profile.

6 Innings with Kerby Valladares

Written by - Posted 2015-05-09 10:49 in Six Innings

A year ago we sat down with Kerby Valladares to do his Six Innings interview. Like all of you, we completely forgot about him after that. Shortly after this interview, Kerby set a record that likely won’t have a chance to be broken. He became the Iron Man of the PWL, setting the record for consecutive games played. He tied Felix Fernandez’s mark of 95 with the tiebreaker game in the Spring 14 season, and broke it week one of the Summer season. As of Week 3 of the Spring 2015 season, he has played in 115 games, every one scheduled for this teams, without missing one. In fact, since the day he joined the PWL, Kerby has never missed a game. A remarkable feat. If only he was a better manager.

Kerby Valladrares
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Kerb, Special K
Age: 21+
Hometown: Uniondale, NY
Resides: Washington, DC
Employer: Working for the Man
Bats: with super human strength, cat like reflexes, and still manages to strike out looking
Throws: to the pitcher when playing the catcher position
How did you find the PWL: I found PWL through Craigslist. I was doing my usual nightly viewing of Casual Encounters when I responded to an ad. I received a response from a woman named Christina, who invited me to a picnic on a Sunday afternoon at Gravelly. The location of said picnic turned out to be Spring Training for Potomac Wiffleball and I found out Christina was actually Chris Gallaway posing as a spam robot to recruit creepers to the league. He suggested I play wiffleball. Naturally, I changed out of my spiffy outfit and got into my wiffleball gear and…Honesty, I searched, “wiffleball leagues in DC” on Google and found PWL. End of story.

Seasons: 9
Career Batting Avg: .261
Awards: Nomination for Gold Glove Catcher and Manager of the Year, but no wins.

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
KV: My favorite baseball team is the New York Mets. My favorite baseball player of all time would be Darryl Strawberry.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
KV: My favorite thing about PWL is that it is a true sports league. We have scorekeepers, umpires, fields with bases, baselines, and a fence with foul poles. We get new balls and bats, recorded games, a website that tracks league leaders and the league has teams with their own personas. It’s like we’re professional athletes but not.

TWIF: Tell us a joke.
KV: Chris Gallaway’s .302 career batting average. (Ba-Dum Tshh!) EDITORS NOTE: 41 points higher than Valladares.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
KV: Only when I throw a hissy fit. *Please see the Easter egg on the box score of Janitors vs. Chuggin’ Chorizos – Bottom of 2nd.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
KV: Jeffrey Nitto. We have yet to face him. We’ve faced Gumballers twice, studied Nitto’s game tape, only to have McClintock pitch shutouts against us. Plus, the Gumballers are the only team to bring dates to the end of the year awards dinner only to stand them up at PWL headquarters. Yet people bad mouth the Moose Knuckles?

TWIF: The Janitors are off to a hot start, but we’ve seen this before, followed by an epic meltdown usually with you standing on the pitcher’s mound asking for a new ball from the umpire. You’ve never made the playoffs. But you made some offseason pickups, notably Felix Fernandez, and roster filler Pike. Your sophomore Jimenez might be finally figuring this out, and your All-Star Higman is back after dislocating his elbow sliding into second base last year. Certainly you’ll improve on your all time .324 win percentage, but, what will the Janitors have to do to get to the postseason for the first time?
KV: Funny you should ask that, the team had a retreat during the off-season. We went to Fairfield, Ct, the birthplace of wiffleball, and I asked the team, that same question, “What will the Janitors have to do to get to the postseason for the first time?”. Here are the responses I received from each player.

  • Alex aka Felix Fernandez – Watch his entire Tom Emanski video collection to learn the fundamentals of baseball.
  • Kevin Higman – Set up a team camera that only records his at bats, so we as a team can copy his hitting skills.
  • Scott Abrahams – First, have fun out there, then read the Blandsford Barnburners’s book, “Championship Hitting and Living like a Champion”. (Which can be found on Freecycle or at any Manassas library in the Free Giveaway section.)
  • Arnoldo Jimenez – Beer, booze, and team uniforms.
  • Chris Pike – Walk up music for our team and a friendly game of knockout against our division rivals.

After all these great suggestions, I decided I shouldn’t pitch unless there are two pitcher ejections. Even though recently retired Janitor, Darryl Wilson, said, “Say it ain’t so K!”. I decided it’s time for someone else to ask for a new ball from the umpire.

NOTE – Since this interview, the Janitors have made the playoffs twice.

6 Innings with Aaron Christoff

Written by - Posted 2014-05-01 23:48 in Six Innings

In the massive and amazing database which houses the statistics of the PWL, (you know, the real reason you come to play), there is a table that has a record for each player. Each player in that table is assigned a unique identification number based on the order that their record was added to the table. Aaron Christoff’s unique ID number is 1. While he certainly wasn’t the first player in the league, he was the first alphabetically by first name when we moved to the centralized database. Which still means he’s been around a while. It’s really too bad you’ve never heard of him before today right?

Aaron Christoff
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Stoff.
Age: 33
Hometown: St. Louis, MO
Resides: Old Town
Employer: Self
Bats: with vigor
Throws: darts
How did you find the PWL: Player Keeven located it online. Manager Keeven then sold a few of us on the idea. It was an easy sell.

Seasons: 9
Career Batting Avg: .302
Awards: Nominations for POTW, MVP and Gold Glove, but no wins.

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
AC: St. Louis Cardinals. Scott Rolen circa ’03-’04.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
AC: That playing it now allows me to tell people I continue to participate in organized sports. At least as long as I can avoid the follow up question about what sport it is.

TWIF: Why did you make Joe leave and when can he come back?
AC: We figured he either had to leave or another manager’s meeting would be spent changing league rules to make him more hittable. That and it really wasn’t so much that I made him leave. When weighing his options of moving to paradise and leaving the rat-race of DC behind, against Sundays at Gravelly, even the allure of enjoying my company on a regular basis lost out. I’d say I can’t blame him but people say that spending time with me is like living in paradise. He’ll come back when the latrines at Gravelly are replaced with a beach and palm trees. Or never.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
AC: It was my preferred launcher when dominating bottle rocket wars in the neighborhood for most of my adolescence.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
AC: Pat Hook. I know he’s a former player and teammate, but he’s still my answer. I can’t imagine liking a guy less, for many reasons. That he’s managed to keep his balance all these years with a head that size really irks me. I’m a fan of physics and that he defies it by continuing to walk with that orange-on-a-toothpick over his shoulders bothers me. I also really hate his personality and the way he talks. His face sucks too. And the fact that my wife regularly mentions how great he is and how much she likes him might also have something to do with my disdain for him.

TWIF: Somehow, quietly, and without much fanfare over nine seasons you’ve become one of the main stays of the PWL. You have three World Series rings, but you’ve been overshadowed by your teammates. Like the 5th Beatle, or that one character actor in movies we all recognize but nobody knows their name. Last season might have been your worst ever. So far this season, you’re starting strong and your numbers seem better than your career averages. What keeps you coming back, and are you the man to fill the hole Joe Thaman left in Wheelchair?
AC: Most of the success I’ve experienced in life results from establishing low expectations. So every once in awhile I throw in a bad year just to reset the bar. Last season in wiffle ball is an example. So was all of 2002. I come back because I dig this league. Met some good people and I’ve never regretted a day spent at the yard. Plus the twenty or so Sundays I spend at Gravelly each year represent about 95% of my exercise regimen. Joe can’t be replaced, on the field or in the clubhouse. But the Wheelchair will roll on.

6 Innings With Anthony Morin

Written by - Posted 2014-04-18 00:28 in Six Innings

Anthony Morin is one of those rare free agents who turned into a lifer. He was assigned to the Canvassers because back in the day the only team that would take free agents was the Commissioner’s own. “I wouldn’t say I saw greatness in him,” Commissioner Gallaway would go on to say, “I felt guilty that he paid his $30 and no one wanted to take him.” Morin established himself as an important, but infrequent part (he was a rookie for three seasons) of the storied franchise over his first few seasons. Gallaway eventually saw something in him though. When he stepped down as the Canvassers manager after 12 seasons, the Commissioner named Morin his successor. After making the playoffs his rookie season as a skipper, Morin’s teams finished .500 or under the next three seasons. A personal renaissance for Morin, however, led to a team renaissance during the Spring 2013 season. In addition to dominating on the mound after finding his pitch, Morin led his team to the World Championship, and claimed a sixth plaque for the franchise on the Commissioner’s Trophy.

It’s also possible he’s submitted the best Six Innings profile picture in league history.

Anthony Morin
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Tony. I’d think of something clever, but considering the PWL website has listed me as Anthony for the last 5 years this may be the only time I’ll ever have a shot at making my true nickname known.
Age: 27
Hometown: Chesapeake, VA
Resides: Washington, DC
Employer: If you ask me in two weeks, I’ll say Apple
Bats: I’d say strong … to quite strong.
Throws: The most unhittable pitch the PWL has ever seen.
How did you find the PWL: Facebook, actually. Does the PWL even advertise on Facebook, or did they somehow just know enough about me to throw a “Are you interested in a wiffleball league” banner ad in my face? Either way it’s creepy, and I still clicked on it. After that was a blur … I remember Gallaway peppering me with questions about my ability to make contact from the right side, then next thing I know I’d been drafted by the Canvassers. Hey, I’m not going to argue with free home and away uniforms.

Seasons: 9
Career Batting Avg: .345
Career ERA: 1.67
Awards: Cy Young Award (Su13), Web Gem of the Week (Su13Wk3), five nominations for POTW but no wins.

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
AM: Definitely the Red Sox. I was born up in Mass. My mom’s a fan, my dad’s a fan, my entire family are fans. It’s sad that I have to provide that level of detail to avoid the bandwagon label, but such is the world we live in. Favorite baseball player of all time, you ready for a curveball? Yogi Berra. I love the guy.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
AM: This one’s tough. I’ll go with either the look on the batter’s face when you drop one in at 17mph on top of the strike board … or ringing someone up with a late read on the radar gun.

TWIF: Describe Sean Hendershot in one word.
AM: Studmuffin.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
AM: Once or twice back in the 80’s, but I did not enjoy it.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
AM: I’ll say only this … when was the last time anyone actually saw Nick DiCrosta?

TWIF: This is your ninth season. You’re 20th on the all time games played list in the league. You’ve been nominated for POTW 5 times and never won. You were nominated for Manager of the Year and a Gold Glove and never won. You took over as manager of the franchise with the most World Championships and for four seasons you only made the playoffs twice. Last season…something happened. After seven seasons of mediocrity you figured out how to pitch a wiffleball. It led to a World Championship and a Cy Young Award. What exactly happened?
AM: 20th all time, wow, really? I’d probably be in the top 10 if it weren’t for all of those last minute “I’m too tired for this crap” early Sunday morning cancellations during my first couple seasons. And I appreciate you highlighting the mediocrity that has plagued most of my career. But you’re right, something just clicked last year. I can’t really say what exactly it was, only because I have no idea what to call that disgusting pitch everyone’s been flailing at. It’s not really a screwball. It’s not really a drop. But it does move 3 feet at a time and hits the strike board relentlessly. It’s that pitch that led me to a a Cy Young season, but a Cy Young caliber pitcher will make any team competitive. Without a doubt the real reason we won the World Championship last summer was because of the guys I got to play with. Kris Garcia would be the ace on probably 95% of the teams in the league, and he was the guy teams had to face when I was off. Spencer Howard was absolutely robbed for Rookie of the Year. We had a Gold Glove winner behind the dish in Pete Hackeman. And Sean “Studmuffin” Hendershot came up with our two biggest hits of the season. The Canvassers didn’t take down Superman’s Wheelchair and The Gumballers on route to their league leading 6th World Championship because one guy had it going. They won because they played well as a team and had a helluva lot of fun doing it.

6 Innings with Jack Rems

Written by - Posted 2013-05-29 21:15 in Six Innings

Our goal this season was to profile the three freshmen leading the charge for Rookie of the Year, statistically anyway, if not popularity wise. Jack Rems was supposed to be the third of those, but with the revelation that Ty Fletcher is still a rookie, makes him our fourth.

Rems probably has the best hitting numbers of the rookies that will qualify, matched with decent numbers from the mound, but has a lot fewer IP’s than Cohn and Brunk. Wiffleball is all about hitting right? The pitchers have their own award, and separate restrooms. The other problem with Rems is he’s stuck on a team that’s awful. So he doesn’t get much exposure, or a chance to drive in runs. The Brohs traditionally have only played the Spring season, which means Rems could be a highly sought after free agent for the summer.

Jack Rems
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: The Mexican
Age: Veintitrés
Hometown: Metuchen, NJ
Resides: Washington, DC
Employer: Clark Construction
Bats: L
Throws: Only when I have to
How did you find the PWL: The first time I heard about the league was from David Bransfield, (aka Lois Goodman). He told me about the league and how the Natty Brohs had a rough season but that they were determined to come back with a vengence. I helped him keep his skills up during the offseason. It first started as just a few simple rounds of BP, but after hearing one great thing after the next, I began to realize that I was destined to join the Broh’s. As luck would have it, two years later I was granted an opportunity to work in the DMV area and I seized the opportunity.

Seasons: .86
Career Batting Avg: .509
Awards: Two player of the week nominations, no wins.

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
JR: For as long as I can remember Ken Griffey Jr has been my main man. He won Gold gloves, home run derbies, MVP awards, and even had his own video game where he would hit a home run every at bat (as long as you entered the code correctly [Left, Left, Right, Right, Right, Left, Left]). Unfortunately, with one of the greatest players of all time comes one of the worst franchises, the Seattle Mariners. Upon my arrival to DC, I immediately jumped on the Nats bandwagon.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
JR: I’m sure I’m not alone in saying that my favorite thing about wiffleball is pretending to be all of my favorite players. Prime example: video.

TWIF: Brohs or hoes?
JR: Brohs fo sho. Unless we’re talking about Lois Goodman, in which case I’d have to say hoes.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
JR: Only if you consider it to be an unintended purpose of a wiffleball bat to chug a beer through it, spin around repeatedly, and inevitably fall on your butt while attempting to hit the crushed beer can with the wiffleball bat. Because I sure don’t.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
JR: It would have to be that guy on the Moose Knuckles who keeps throwing his bat. What’d the bat ever do to you, man?

TWIF: As a rookie you’re hitting over .500. You played in the third longest game in league history, 28 innings. You broke the single game record for hits and singles in that game, including having 4 doubles. You have scored 8 times, and hit 4 home runs in your short career. Why, oh why, did you somehow lose the ability to find home plate in that game, and what are you doing to make sure it doesn’t happen again?
JR: Yes, the game was long and probably could have ended sooner, especially if Brian Burrell would have taken one for the team and dove head first into home. And yes, it was miserable to watch. Matt Gagnon of the Moose Knuckles even had this to tweet during the game, “3 hours without a run. Give them both a loss and move on @potomacwiffle #pathetic.” I feel your pain Matt. There were even jokes (more like plots) between the Brohs and the Circle Jerks about ending the game any way possible. Looking back there were only two ways to remedy the situation: 1) “accidentally” drop the next fly ball to me allowing the winning run to score or 2) put me in to pitch because I can’t throw strikes and will just get ejected a few batters later. Unfortunately for our playoff chances, we opted for the latter.

6 Innings with Colin Gannon

Written by - Posted 2013-05-25 12:19 in Six Innings

If you know him at all, you know him as the manager of the Blandsford Barnburners. Much like Art Howe in a Billy Bean GM’d club, Gannon’s role is largely ceremonial. The Shannons have given him advice on how to “look” like he’s the manager; how to fill out the line up card, how to pretend to be “managing”, to have thoughtful expressions on his face while sitting on the bench after making an out even though his mind is far from the game.

For a time, he was the starting pitcher who replaced Jacob Tomko on the bump when Tomko was designated for assignment. But, in the new all-Shannon, only-Shannon Barnburners rotation, he and teammate Ty Fletcher serve a different role, a third warm body so they don’t have to forfeit. Make no mistake, if the rules allowed this to be a two person team, they would not have a catcher and just play two. Despite not being good at wiffleball, or apparently employable, Gannon is kind of like-able, and a few of his lady friends have visited the fields over the years. So, he’s got that going for him.

Colin Gannon
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Lefty
Age: 22
Hometown: Manassas, Virginia
Resides: Arlington, Virginia
Employer: Bad Time to Ask :(
Bats: Yes
Throws: Yes
How did you find the PWL: Stumbled out of the woods and ended up at Ft. Reno.

Seasons: 5
Career Batting Avg: .390
Awards: Gold Glove – Fielder (Sp09), Manager of the Year (Sp11), NWLA 2nd Team Pitchers (2012)

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
CG: Boston Red Sox/“Spaceman” Lee. I modeled my entire pitching repertoire after the Leephus.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
CG: Replaying the videos of my World Series walk-off homers when Pornhub gets a little mundane.

TWIF: Travel to Ohio or sleep in on your couch all weekend?
CG: Definitely travel to Ohio. Anyone willing to spend their 21st birthday at a Dublin, Ohio, Hooters is clearly a dedicated asset to the group, don’t you agree?
TWIF: Not when that person hits .295 in underhanded slow pitch wiffleball.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
CG: I spent the entire first half of my career using a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
CG: Easy. Uncle Rico.

TWIF: You’re the second Barnburner manager after Jack fizzled out. It must be hard to manage, if that’s what you call what you do, a team with so many egos, who have literally known and played together since you were all kids. How do you do it, and what advice do you have for rookie managers out there after four rings?
CG: We knew Jack wasn’t going to last when he tried to bench Jim after the first game of our first season, despite Jim hitting for the cycle in the first inning. To answer your question, its not what I call what I do, but my advice to the rookie managers out there after winning four rings would be obviously to find an ultimate frisbee league or get used to annual disappointment in the form of multiple Twin dingers.

6 Innings with Ty Fletcher

Written by - Posted 2013-05-22 12:36 in Six Innings

It must be awkward being the least talented Barnburner, but probably not as awkward as being in your fifth season in the league and still qualifying as a “rookie”. Such is the life of Ty Fletcher. Honestly, if he didn’t have four World Series rings, we probably wouldn’t even remember this guys name.

It’s hard to tell if his regular presence this season is a positive of a negative for Barnburners. The past four seasons Fletcher spent most of his time someplace other than Gravelly and never got enough plate appearances to qualify for the season stats. Per the PWL practice, that makes this Fletcher’s rookie season. And while his stats probably deserve a nomination for Rookie of the Year, we assume the voters in the league know better than to vote for him.

Ty Fletcher
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Tickleshits
Age: 23
Hometown: Manassas, Virginia
Resides: Arlington, Virginia
Employer: Grabber Construction Products
Bats: Are scary as shit
Throws: Usually in the first or second inning after a Gannon start
How did you find the PWL: Woke up at fort Reno after a phish concert with Brian Ford and was very intrigued with the yellow lightsabers.

Seasons: 5
Career Batting Avg: .417
Awards: 1 Nomination for Player of the Week

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
TF: I grew up on the Orioles but I have embraced the hometown Nationals. I would have to say my favorite baseball player is Jay Buhner. In Ken Griffey jr baseball he displays the ability to throw runners out at the plate, on a line, from the warning track, which is simply remarkable.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
TF: When Commissioner Gallaway mercilessly berates toddlers for entering the field of play.

TWIF: Twin fight or Gagnon/Filides bat tantrum?
TF: The common occurrence due to poor plate performance takes the mystery and fun out of the bat tantrums. When there is a twin fight you never know what will spark it or who is gonna end up in the hospital. I have seen garbage cans, rakes,controllers,and even frozen foods used in the field of battle. This one isn’t even close.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
TF: We were out of solo cups during a team trip to the river. The commissioners trophy served as a fine substitute.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
TF: Rawdog or Crawfish… Whoever pitches for the Twits. It will be tough to consistently pitch the ball 10+ mph over the league limit while helplessly submerged under water.

TWIF: You and Colin Gannon fight for the basement as the least talented Barnburner and statistically, you’re only slightly better at fielding and worse at everything else. In the last World Series Championship you didn’t take a single at bat. And yet, you got a team hat, just like everyone else. Don’t you think you’d be more comfortable on the Master Batters, or someplace where your star could shine a little brighter?
TF: That’s a clown question Bro. The team basement I live in is filled with magic, not camouflaged alternates and Sunday golf outings once the playoffs begin.

6 Innings with Joel Brunk

Written by - Posted 2013-05-18 12:55 in Six Innings

Fresh off a Player of the Week win, we sit down with our second rookie this season, Joel Brunk. Brunk has brought some much needed offense to 7th Linning Stretch and seems to have settled into the starting pitching role as well.

He’s on the leader boards for pitching (ERA/OBA/HIP) and batting (RBI/TB), and is fighting neck and neck with Alex Cohn for the best numbers this season for a rookie. Though, sometimes the numbers get overshadowed in the popularity contest of the year end voting. Brunk’s role on a possible playoff team, and Cohn’s recent injury, could become factors in voters’ minds.

Joel Brunk
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Jake – yeah I don’t get it. Only my dad uses it, somehow it’s easier to say than Joel?
Age: 30
Hometown: Bridgewater, VA
Resides: Alexandria, VA
Employer: U.S. General Services Administration (GSA)
Bats: Right
Throws: Right
How did you find the PWL: Nick West – I invited myself onto his team after he mentioned it to others during a fantasy baseball draft, although he’ll tell you he recruited me.

Seasons: .79
Career Batting Avg: .409
Awards: Player of the Week (Sp13 – Week 5)

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
JB: St. Louis Cardinals. My favorite color was green at age 4 in the late 80’s, which naturally meant my favorite team was the A’s and my favorite player was Mark McGwire. When Tony La Russa and McGwire went to St. Louis, I followed and have been a fan since. No, I don’t juice like my former idol.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
JB: The fact that I can hit a homer. I was the definition of warning track power growing up playing baseball.

TWIF: Name your least favorite West.
JB: Nick. His hitting prowess and reputation are overshadowing my campaign for ROY. We also have an ugly history on the basketball court that rivals Bird and Lambier. I’m just getting to know Matt, but he’s by far the nicer West.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
JB: Growing up my siblings and I used our wiffleball bat as a microphone, shield, crutch, light saber, spoon, torch, etc. But most often it was used as a club to beat the winner of whatever game we were playing.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
JB: Alex Cohn. Seems like a nice guy, hope that thumb feels better, but somehow his flashy web gems have earned him the frontrunner position for ROY. I guess I make it look too easy, or all my plays don’t count (see Brunk falls on Trunk video, which doesn’t clearly show that it was a Willie Mays style over the shoulder catch as I fell over the fence) or are off camera (I swear, they happened). Anyway, pretty sure he’s Harper and I’m Trout in this situation.

TWIF: You seem to be the only guy keeping 7th Linning alive. Early on, the Commissioner predicted a quick and quiet fall for your team. This was done using stats, past results, and a gut feeling about all possibly likelihood of your season. You seem to have picked them up on your shoulders, and drug them being over .500. Driving in runs when needed, keeping the opposing offense in check. My question is, don’t you think your team name is kind of lame?
JB: Being a rookie, I’ve been coached extensively on how to respond to questions like this, else my spot in the lineup could be in jeopardy. Despite the obvious truths you point out, this is a team game and it has been a true team effort to get over .500 and into the playoff picture. We’re only going to get better as we gel together as a team and learn how to throw strikes consistently. And yeah, I honestly didn’t get the name until Nick explained it in Week 3. I thought it was some inside joke, and I was just trying to fit in so I kept my mouth shut. Hopefully I’ve earned my keep enough to publicly call it lame now without getting fined.

6 Innings with Alex Cohn

Written by - Posted 2013-05-16 16:06 in Six Innings

You know this rookie for his one handed diving catches in the web gems. The only standout on an otherwise forgettable Besley Bashers team, Cohn can bat, pitch, and field, a triple threat. It wasn’t a diving catch that may have sidelined Cohn for the season though. While trying to stretch a single into a double he dislocated his thumb, and may have eliminated the need for Besley to even show up the next couple of weeks to try and add on to their three wins. (“How did we even win three?” manager Colton Turner says as he shakes his head in disgust.)

The number of at bats needed to qualify for the year end awards varies based on the number of forfeits. But, if we don’t have any more forfeits, it will take 42 at bats to qualify. Cohn is sitting at 38 right now. So, if his season is over, he won’t even be on the ballot for Rookie of the Year. But, if he can take a few more hacks, even one-handed, (allowed only in case of disability) even if he goes 0-for-3, he’s in the discussion.

Alex Cohn
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Big Al. This was never really a nickname but someone was yelling it from the bench in Week 1.
Age: 24
Hometown: Tampa, FL
Resides: Arlington, VA
Employer: Student. I’m going back to school so I can wear my hat backwards again.
Bats: Right
Throws: Right, If my hand doesn’t heal maybe Left.
How did you find the PWL: My girlfriend and fellow Basher (not Colton), her brother and his buddies were signing up and knew I played. I was living in Wisconsin at the time so I quit my job and moved to DC to be on the team.

Seasons: .79
Career Batting Avg: .500
Awards: 1 Player of the Week Nomination, 3 Web Gem Nominations, 2 Wins (though 1 was a tie)

TWIF: What is your favorite baseball team and who is your favorite baseball player of all time?
AC: The Rays. Andy Sonnanstine was the man. He was a very mediocre pitcher, losing his starting spot in the rotation, then losing a spot in the pen. I think he’s in the Cubs’ farm system now. But he seemed like the kind of guy I would be good friends with. He would vandalize the ballpark and was usually the one putting seeds on guys’ heads during in-game interviews. I think there’s a lot to be said for keeping the clubhouse light.

TWIF: What is your favorite thing about wiffleball?
AC: I think my favorite thing about wiffle is that there is absolutely no age limit. You play as a kid, you play with your drunk friends in college, you join a highly managed rule-stickling league in your 20s, and then you have a kid of your own and have an excuse to pick up that banana-yellow bat again. I feel confident my kid won’t get a hit off me until he’s a grown-ass man.

TWIF: Old logo or new logo?
AC: New. I’m not sure what the old logo was. It looked like a bunch of bugs crawling around. I think they were supposed to be syringes or crushed beer cans or something. Presumably to advertise and encourage how many drugs our team uses? We’re clean, just horrendous artists.

TWIF: Have you ever used a wiffleball bat for other than its intended purpose?
AC: My last year of college I lived in a decrepit old house (RIP The Rock) with no locks on the doors. In fact, there was no front door for a brief period. It wasn’t in a terrible neighborhood, but it was right on the edge of where the rough area of town began. After a summer of vacancy we returned to school in the Fall to find a homeless man asleep in the bathtub. Anyway, I kept my wiffleball bat by my bed for self-defense. Only had to use it once.

TWIF: If you could drown one player in the Potomac river, who would it be and why?
AC: Since it’s my first season I don’t have any grudges yet. I also don’t want to start any because of a 6 innings profile. That said, Chris Smyth for robbing me of sole possession of a week three web gem. I suppose drowning my manager would also work for blocking the camera on the play.

TWIF: Before your thumb injury, you were off to a strong individual rookie season. Like all new teams, it’s taking you guys a while to figure things out as a group, but you seem to have all the tools to be a solid hitter, pitcher and fielder, the stats and the awards show that. What makes you the best Besley Basher, and are you going to be a Basher for life?
AC: I think it’s obvious what makes me the best Besley Basher: strongest beard in the lineup. Although Neil is giving me a run for my money. Shannon’s beard sucks. No contracts have been signed and I was waiting for an ESPN exclusive to make an announcement but…I will be keeping my talents on Besley Road.

6 Innings with Matt Gagnon

Written by - Posted 2012-09-27 19:23 in Six Innings

Our last six innings of the season is going to surprise some of you, nauseate others, and cause five of you to hoot, holler and high five. We sit down with Matt Gagnon the manager of the Moose Knuckles, the current #1 seeds heading into the postseason.

As most of you know who have eyes, ears, a twitter account, or have talked to anyone who’s played, the Moose Knuckles and their manager are a little “intense” and have earned a little bit of a reputation in the league for being disliked. No matter, they’re not playing to win friends, they’re playing to in hopes that getting grass and dirt stains will dim the neon yellow color of those obnoxious jerseys.

Matt Gagnon
[ player profile page]

Nickname: THE
Age: 25
Hometown: Born in Methuen Massachusetts. Grew up in Leesburg, Va
Resides: Gaithersburg, MD
Employer: Global Facility Solutions
Bats: Barely
Throws: Junk
How did you find the PWL: The Moose Knuckles were actually first formed in college when we played in a tournament that the Wiffleball Club of Virginia Tech put on every semester. After I graduated and wiffleball was no longer a part of my life, I battled some pretty serious withdrawals. I was giving handies behind bars in DC in exchange for throwing me a few soft tosses. My life was spinning out of control until a friend of mine sent me a link to this league. We were so excited about playing again, I think we signed up our team the day Chris opened up registration for Spring 2012, and the rest is history.

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6 Innings with Jeffrey Nitto

Written by - Posted 2012-09-14 09:58 in Six Innings

Finally a profile of someone with some fresh blood who might be younger than 40.

The rookie Gumballers are owning the Eastern Division this season and Nitto’s pitching is a major factor for them. He leads the league in shutouts, is tied for Wins (though we all agree that’s a meaningless pitching stat, right?) and tops the leader board in most pitching categories. He also had a perfect game, but those are given out like candy this season thanks to the Have Fun Out Theres.

The first season is traditionally tough on rookie teams, but it looks like the Gumballers are playoff bound and with weak rosters on traditional powerhouse teams might have a shot at playing for the title.

Jeffrey Nitto
[ player profile page ]

Nickname: Nitto, Nitro, Ankle Braces
Age: 27
Hometown: Albany, NY
Resides: Arlington, VA
Employer: Department of Energy
Bats: Right
Throws: Right
How did you find the PWL: Captain of our team Brennan Reif found it online and I knew I had to get in on the action.

Seasons: .75
Career Batting Avg: .469
Awards: Player of the Week SU 2012 WK4

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